Beginning Again – 2020

I didn’t blog as much in 2019. Taking a break wasn’t intentional, it just sort of happened. I considered why I wasn’t writing as much and would tell myself that I didn’t have anything to say or write about. I realized later on that this wasn’t completely true.

I also wondered if I really missed blogging. I’m very introverted, and it’s challenging for me to share parts of my life on this very public platform. Blogging was an important part of my early years in New York. I needed a space to sort my thoughts, a place to document my personal growth. I thought that maybe I’d outgrown With Muchness, that I didn’t need this platform any more. But I actually do miss the practice, the discipline it takes to write something and the vulnerability that comes with publishing content. It keeps me honest. I can articulate things when I write that I can’t when I speak.

I’ve been in Florida visiting family for the holidays, and have realized that I did have things to say over the past several months. I simply felt insecure about sharing them. I also fell into a pattern of comparison, like this person’s blog has so many more followers and content that people are actually reading. It’s arguably more successful than mine. I began using the excuse: no one reads my blog anyways, so why invest the time in it?

But then, it hit me. No one cares if I have thousands of followers least of all me. It’s not a measure of success to me, because it’s never been about having a massive following or generating enough income to support myself through my blog. I started With Muchness in order to have a creative outlet and find my voice as a writer, and some where along the way, I forgot that.

I’ve decided that followers are nice, but it doesn’t matter if anyone reads this or finds what I write about interesting. It’s still worth the time investment because it’s still meaningful to me.

As we enter 2020, I’m setting goals for the year. Some I want to keep to myself, but one is to spend 30 minutes a day writing. It could be any form of writing, a blog post, a journal entry or something else entirely. Another, which I know I share with others, is to get back to consistently exercising. Since November, I have been off my routine and hope to find my rhythm again in 2020.

I wish you and your family a fresh start, good health and a very Happy New Year. Here’s to 2020 and beginning again.

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